An Interesting Case of The Boss

The characters in this play are real. Any resemblance with anyone is absolutely intentional.

The Boss- head of chemical biology lab
Vy- fifth year graduate student
April- first year postdoctoral fellow
Sailaja- second year postdoctoral fellow
Karthik- fourth year graduate student
Maritza- first year graduate student
Caitlin- fourth year graduate student
me- first year postdoctoral fellow

Scene 1, Act 1

BPR Building, University of Utah Medical School

Monday
8:33 AM, enter the lab from organic chemistry side and immediately smell of triethylamine greets me.
Me: Vy, what the heck is the smell? Why don't you use the fumehood when you work with obnoxious substances?
Vy: I always work in the hood. I do not know where the smell comes from.
Me: ok

8:40 AM, I am web browsing in my laptop and Vy, beside me, is chatting with her "millionaire boyfriend" and her other Vietnamese friends.
Me: Boss is here yet?
Vy (while intently typing on her messenger screen): Yes. He was talking with April on the other side of the lab. She already got one Kuby this morning.
(One Kuby is defined as half an hour of non-stop talk from boss. Mathematically, 1 Kuby= 30 min * 1000 words (give or take)/ min by Kuby, the boss. This definition has been redefined, recently, as total number of spit-laden words that can kill 50 zebra fish i.e. the IC50Kuby )
Me: Nice, I need to start working then. If he sees me sitting, I will be next victim.
Vy: My boyfriend does not want to marry me. I am already old.
She always brings up, randomly, getting married or having babies or going out for shopping in the weekend or complain about her roommate etc. I just ignore her.

9:30 AM, Boss walks by and I get busy examining round bottom flask. I know that there is nothing in it, but, I am completely absorbed in it and put a magnetic stir bar.
The Boss: Good morning Mausam, How was the weekend? Do you have anything to talk? science?
Me: Nope, everything is fine.
The Boss: I came this morning and there was a strong smell.
Me: I felt that too. Someone is probably working with amine base.
The Boss: We need to be careful. It is not good for health.
Me. Yep, yep!
The Boss (slowly thumping his left chest with right fist to jump start his slow heart, started with low voice): I am under lot of pressure due to the new grant. I want you to help me writing a story of our research in the lab in last six months.
Me: Yep, yep!
The Boss: I want you to help me, you know. I am under tremendous stress. I am going to NIH meeting next month and then, will go to Virgina for another meeting. Then, I have to submit Vimal's review paper. I will take one week off to read Vy and Thao's paper and submit them.

After an injection of one Kuby, he started again.
Me: Yep, yep!
The Boss: Where do you stand on your quantum dot project?
Me: I am running gel and figure out the binding of quantum dot with protein.
The Boss: Good; Mausam, I want you to be successful and work hard, exercise and most importantly, happy. When I was in MIT, I used to go to lab at 7 AM and come back at midnight. My boss was hard-nose on science, but, he did not care about my health.
(He slowly and surely moving towards my face)
No adviser will ask you to take care of your health. But, I want you to be successful, work hard and healthy.

Telephone rang and Vy answers the call. I hear a few words flying from her mouth.
Vy: V for Victor, Y for Yellow, T for Tom, R for rabbit, A for Apple and N for Nancy.
Me: (There, we go again)

In the meantime, Kuby is at fervor pitch. It is already 10:30 AM. Karthik comes in and switches off the lights in the lab for his experiment.

10:30 AM
The Boss: Oh! my God (his response to switching off lights). Coming back Mausam, I want you to work hard, but, have fun too. You need to exercise, eat good food and work hard.

Redundancy sets in and boss is recycling the sentences. Fortunately, Sailaja, our organic chemistry PostDoc, interjects while we are talking.
Sailaja: Mausam, I am going for Mass Spec. Are you coming?
Me: Yeah, yeah! I have to go now.
The Boss: OK, good. Sailaja, do you have anything to talk at all, science?
Sailaja: No, we are going for Mass Spec.

11 AM
Sailaja and I are walking to the Mass Spec Facility one floor above our lab.
Me: Thank you Sailaja for rescuing me from excruciating pain of almost four Kubys. By the way, I do not have any sample, you know, right?
Sailaja: I know. Don't worry. I will teach you how to operate the machine today.
Me: This a great way to rescue someone from onslaught of the boss.
Sailaja: Yeah, we do apply this technique in our lab often.
Me: We are, now, highly evolved animal.

Scene 1, Act 2

12 PM, lunch at the lobby area where we discuss guns, gluten free food, entrepreneurial endeavors and above all, influence of Kuby on our lives, in general.

Karthik: I bought a business last weekend. It cost me only $2000. I am writing programs to bring the business online.
Vy (completely indifferent to the ecology outside her self): I went to a party last weekend and drank vodka. Some Korean girls got drunk and removed their clothes.
Me: That's nice, invite me to such parties next time.
April: I was in Las Vegas last weekend with my grandma.
Me: Your grandma in Las Vegas? How old is she?
April: She is 82 and still enjoys alcohol and gambling. She is going to LV each year since 1970. I was not born then.
Me: Kudos! She has some lust for life.

Maritza is our first year grad student with two kids. She was air force guard before joining grad school.
Maritza: Aam, I slept only three hours last night.
Me: What did you do? Sell drugs at night?
Maritza: Noooooo, I cooked, cleaned, did laundry, gave kids bath.
Vy: Its amazing how you do these stuff and still have time for research. Ah! my boyfriend doesn't want to marry me. I would rather marry a Mormon and make babies.
Maritza: I love research, but, I hate stupid course-work.

In the meantime, I am thinking to ask Karthik about his business as it is his "latest" passion
Me: Karthik, lets make some money this weekend. I am gonna cook and you are the salesperson. We will split our profit 50/50
Karthik: We have to cook food in a kitchen approved by the food inspectors and it is going to be very difficult.
Me: You are the businessman and you can figure out anything.

Vy is making some crunchy sound while eating and April, Maritza and Caitlin are looking at her with utmost interest.

Caitlin: How are your classes, Maritza?
Maritza: I hate them. We covered only two slides in entire 45 min and Janis Lou was talking how her husband wanted her to run with him for moral support. She would do everything to get attention of guys. When a pencil fell on the floor, all guys were running to pick it up. It was disgusting.
Vy visibly expressed her admiration to Janis
Vy: She has very hot body.
Me: Vy, please do not mention the word "body".
April: You do not need to be here if you get the job you have applied to. (April told referring to Maritza)

Suddenly, the boss dashes and interjects during our lunch hour

The Boss: Vy, Vyyyyy
Vy: yes!
The Boss: I have something to talk about, now.
Vy: OK

Both went to the hallway to have a "secret" conversation.

Scene 2, Act 1

1 PM-3 PM

Me: Maritza, you look ravishing today.
Maritza: Aam, I used to be hot in high school. And, there were a lot of dating offers. There was this professor, an old hag and he wanted to date me.
Me: Why? Young people did not find you attractive?

Vy interjects

Vy: Maritza is very hot even now.
Martiza: Oh Vy, I ordered this top for me from ebay, but, it does no fit me. I have brought this for you. You can try and if fits, you can keep it.
Vy: Aww! it looks very sexy. I will try it tonight and let you know. Thank you, Maritza.
Maritza: I would have kept it, but, it is small for me.

I have started to run column in my hood and butterflies all around my ears. And now, April joins the conversation from the other room.

April: What is this?
Maritza: This is a top I bought from ebay. (well, I call it a bra!) This fits neither me nor Vy. Do you want to try?
April: Yeah, sure.
Maritza: Hey Vy, if you are looking for affordable lingerie, you should try www.adoreme.com

Vy is instantly typing on her computer.
Vy: Oh, this is good.
Me: Vy, can I see?
Vy: These are ladies stuff.
Me: Right, I thought you were discussing about guys. Maritza is spreading soft porn in the lab.
Maritza: Heyyyy!!

In an instant, the door opens and The Boss comes in. Everybody changes the subject to random science, which never make any sense.

Maritza: Yeah, I am trying to conjugate oligosaccharide with AMAC, but, it has not worked.
Vy: Did you add catalytic amount of acid?
Maritza: I tried everything, but, I could not see the desired peak in LC-MS

April leaves to the other side of the lab and the Boss follows her. I overhear him.

The Boss: Do you have anything to talk at all?
April: Nope.
The Boss: Do you know the activity of the enzyme?
April: I told you that we would not know about it until tomorrow.
The Boss: OK, do you have anything else to talk about?
April: Nope

Now, the boss rushes into our side of the lab and stands beside Maritza.

The Boss: Maritza, anything you want to talk briefly?
Maritza: Yeah, the Mass Spec is broken.
The Boss: Again? So, have you called the Brucker?
Maritza: Yeah, they are trying to fix it online. We will know by this afternoon.
The Boss: Brucker guys are professional. But, I need to sit down on top of Agilent guys to make them fix our HPLCs. What to do? Ah, Ah, Cait....Cait....        Maritza?
Maritza: I have sent the data to Fusan. She called this morning at 6 AM.
The Boss: Oh, my God! You know, she is under tremendous pressure.
Maritza: She wants me to repeat LC-MS for a few samples and the machine is broken now. It is very frustrating.
The Boss: Hang on there, Maritza. At the end of every road there is a tunnel.
Maritza: What?
Now, the boss thought about what he just said.
The Boss: No, it makes sense, I am sticking with it.
Maritza: Anyway.
The Boss: Everything is okay, Maritza?
Maritza: Aam, yeah!
The Boss: Good.

As the boss has started to go towards the door, he comes back towards me. I am working on my column chromatography intently and Karthik is taking some enzymes out of the box from the -80 degree freezer behind my back. The boss looks at both of us and starts.

The Boss: O Karthik, what to do? I have realized just now that I have a lecture to give in the training camp. It is two hours lecture on sialic acid. Do you have any interesting article?
Karthik: No
The Boss: Okay, I will figure out. Mausam, do you have any article on sialic acid?
Me: No, I do not.

Scene 2, Act 2

3PM-5PM

I'm done with column purification of my compound while tolerating the lingerie conversation and amazing Boss' vapor spray from half a foot distance. I am heading towards the rotavap in the other room to evaporate hexane/ethyl acetate mixture. Karthik has switched off the lights in that room so that he can work in doxorubicin-polysaccharide conjugates. The boss is singing his gospel in darkness.

The Boss: I do not care about the impact factor of the journals. The work should be novel and you should be happy with your work. I have seen a lot of great scientists, like Nobel laureates who are fucked up. I created the whole field of enzymatic synthesis and some people do not even cite my work. That's fine with me. It is not the number of citations, but, total number of downloads of your paper which is the most important.
Karthik: I see.
The Boss: I sent my paper to science and they took one year to reject me. The reason for rejection was that the paper was too long. Ten years later, Bob has published a paper on the same work I did. Where is the novelty? This is the politics of paper publishing.
The Boss: You have to work hard, eat good food and exercise. And, success is the time you spent on your bench divided by the time you spent on your computer. I used to work 80-90h a week when in grad school and 120-130h a week during PostDoc. I did not have great relation with my PhD adviser, but, the day defended my thesis, he told to the audience that I was the only PhD student who was hard on myself and was the most hard working. So, tell me how many students got training in his lab?
Karthik: I do not know.
The Boss: About 40 PhD students and 60-70 PostDocs. However, my PostDoc adviser had huge respect for me. He went to India all the way from Boston on my wedding day. I was overwhelmed. Do you have anything to talk at all?
Karthik: No

Once done with evaporation of solvent, I'm going to place the compound under vacuum on the Chemistry side.

Me: Maritza, you know that we have a brand new definition of success.
Maritza: I have heard that. I would like to modify it. Success is the (time you spend on bench minus time you spent on your computer)/time your boss talks with you
Me: That's great. I call it The Boss-Maritza Theory. Yes, now, it sounds kinda Higgs-Boson.
Maritza: he he, I have to go now. I have to do the stupid home-work and cook food. I will be back at night.
Sailaja: Why do you come back at night? Just do whatever you have to do; relax!
Maritza: No, I have to work on the samples from the Arkansas lady. I will be ready when Mass Spec is fixed.
Me: Maritza, lets develop a new reaction, a chemiluminescent reaction which is bioorthogonal
Maritza: Sure, after my exams.

Scene 2, Act 3

5PM-7PM

The compound is under vacuum for NMR analysis and I am reading some papers on my computer contributing to my "success ratio". And as usual, the boss walks in again.

The Boss: O Mausam, what to do? I am thinking if I should relocate my lab to somewhere else. I have a few offers. What do you think?
Me: If you get offer from Boston or California, you should take it.
The Boss: I am considering all the options very carefully. I am not interested in MIT as people are brutal, arrogant there. I am happy here. The mountains in Salt Lake have humbled me. Before coming here for interview, I was not sure about the city. But, when I came, the mountains reminded me how small we were.
Me: Nice
The Boss: How is your glycopolymer mimetic project going?
Me: pretty good. I am trying to optimize the Mitsunobu reaction. The reported reaction did not work. So, I had to find an alternative. It seems to work now. We will see.
The Boss: The reported reaction did not work at all?
Me: Nope. It is interesting that its Laura's work which I could not reproduce
The Boss: I have seen a lot of researchers who just produce papers which are craps. We had much smarter scientists 30-40 years ago than now.
Me: Yeah, German chemist Georg Wittig reported cyclooctyne "click" chemistry with azide in 1960. This has become bioorthogonal chemistry now. It seems that our generation is trying to modify the science which has already been done.
The Boss: I think its sialic acid in human milk, which has been shown to cross the blood-brain barrier of postnatal child implicating significant role in learning and memory. The old generation was breast fed which, in turn, made smart scientists. Now, we have formula milk.
Me: May be, I have to go for NMR
The Boss: Okay

It is almost 7PM and I am analyzing NMR of the compound that I purified. Oh snap! it is the starting material that I have recovered. Oh well, that means I have to live another day to try another method to synthesize the target molecule. I JUST LOVE SCIENCE!

Crucifixion / ক্ৰুছবিদ্ধ আই মোৰ

Freedom was promised

at the stroke of the midnight hour.

Inevitable was my birth
amid lightening riot of hope.
(and I was born free)

Then, they burnt my brush

the day I painted my sister 

crucified in South Delhi, 

and she was violated in love, in marriage.

(and I was born free)

Then, they ravaged my words

the day I wrote of children of nation enslaved

by capitalo-socialism, by empty stomach, 

by already "fixed" level playing field.
(and I was born free)

Then, they maimed my voice

the day I protested in million thunder

against tyranny, against female foeticide,

against corruption in politics,

corruption in criminal justice system,

corruption in my Mother’s milk

and I was born free!
................................................................

ক্ৰুছবিদ্ধ আই মোৰ

মাজনিশাই নিজৰ অস্তিত্ব ঘোষণা কৰিছিল,
আৰু স্বাধীনতাৰ প্ৰতিশ্ৰুতি দিয়া হৈছিল মোৰ আইক।
নিদ্ৰাত মগ্ন আঁউসীৰ মৰ্ত্য,
এয়েই সময় মোৰ জন্মৰ।
(মই স্বাধীনতা)

যি বুৰুজেদি মই মোৰ ভগ্নীৰ দুৰ্দশা আঁকিছিলো,
সেই বুৰুজক কুকুৰহঁতে জুই লগাই দিলে।
মোৰ ভন্তিক বাৰে বাৰে ধৰ্ষণ কৰা হৈছিল;
লাজঁপত নগৰত, 
প্ৰেমত, বিবাহত.....
(মই স্বাধীনতা)

মোৰ শব্দৰ সমাহৰণকো ধংস কৰিলে কুকুৰহঁতে।
যিদিনা মই ৰাষ্ট্রৰ অৰ্ধনগ্ন শিশুবোৰৰ কথা লিখিছিলো,
গোলাম সিইঁত পুঁজি-সমাজবাদৰ, পেটৰ ভোকৰ,
আৰু পূৰ্ব-নিৰ্ধাৰিত তথাকথিত প্ৰতিযোগিতা বোৰৰ।
(মই স্বাধীনতা)

তাৰপিছত, কুকুৰহঁতে মোৰ কন্ঠক চিৰপংগু কৰিলে।
যিদিনা মই সহশ্ৰ কন্ঠেৰে চিঞৰি উঠিছিলো,
ৰাষ্ট্রৰ অন্যায়ৰ বিৰুদ্ধে,শিশু কন্যাৰ ভ্রূণ হত্যাৰ বিৰুদ্ধে,
ৰাজনীতিত, দণ্ডবিধি ন্যায়াধীশত ভ্ৰষ্টাছাৰৰ বিৰুদ্ধে, 
আৰু মোৰ আইৰ গাখিৰত দুৰ্নীতিৰ বিৰুদ্ধে।
মই স্বাধীনতা আছিলো।

Stories of Smart Sugar and Vulnerable Sugar

Story1. Does Absence of An Oxygen Atom in Sugar Make Us Human?

At this moment, an experiment is going on in a secret lab somewhere in Unites States to initiate probable spark of intelligence in a chimpanzee; its after all, elimination of an oxygen (O) atom from a sugar molecule called sialic acid, ubiquitous to our body. This tiny change initiates cascade of physiological changes including connectivity in brain cells and hence, learning and memory.

The story goes back to 1998 when Prof. Ajit Varki at UCSD demonstrated that chimps, baboons, gorillas and orangutans have a specific sialic acid molecule called N-glycolyl neuraminic acid (Neu5Gc). We, Homo sapiens, do not have this molecule; instead, we have another version of sialic acid called N-acetyl neuraminic acid (Neu5Ac). The only difference between these two molecules is the presence of an oxygen atom in Neu5Gc and this changes the way proteins interact with each other, carbohydrates interact with each other and protein interact with carbohydrates. A small change in organic structure can have prodigious biological ramifications such as our vulnerability to HIV (apes do not get infected with HIV), Alzheimer's Disease, multiple sclerosis.

We have a faulty gene and therefore, a faulty protein that fails to convert Neu5Ac to Neu5Gc. If this protein starts to function, we will have early cancer, inflammation, platelet dysfunctions etc. Prof. Varki believes that evolutionary pressure to cope with malarial parasite Plasmodium reichenowi in African jungle brought about this change in our gene. In the meantime, malarial parasite also evolved into Plasmodium falciparum in order to hook on to Neu5Ac present on red blood cells of human. Thus, the deletion of oxygen atom helped us survive for sometime, but, it came with other trade-offs. For example, it is now established that HIV-1 enters human immune cells after communicating with Neu5Ac. However, this sugar molecule might have tremendous role in memory and learning in humans and it is possible that the faulty gene has made us intelligent ape!

(Reference. Nature, 2008, 454, 21-23)

Story2. Are We One Avian Flu Mutation Away from Extinction?

Extremely contagious influenza virus has hit us from ages but, avian influenza virus invasion is a rare event. Viral protein, hemagglutitin (HA) talks with the sugar-sugar conjugate, Neu5Ac-Galactose (linkage 2-6) present on our respiratory cells and get permission to enter. This virus, then, makes home at the upper respiratory tract and spread through human to human contact, but, this virus is innocuous unlike avian flu. Bird flu is not only highly contagious but also extremely lethal among birds. It can hardly cross the inter-species barrier as it cannot communicate with our Neu5Ac-Galactose (linkage 2-6) but, only with a structural analog, Neu5Ac-Galactose (linkage 2-3), found in minor population of epithelial cells deep within lungs.

How did avian flu cross the bird to man species barrier in 2006 causing 108 deaths worldwide? It was lower respiratory tract infection through Neu5Ac-Galactose (linkage 2-3) recognition in human. Luckily, this lethal virus home at the lower respiratory tract for infection and hence, prevents human to human transfer. 

Let me bring the scary aspect of mutation and our chance of extinction to fatal contagious influenza virus. The virus particles always reproduce when in contact with a living object. What if one of these reproductions initiate a mutation in the viral protein, hemagglutitin (HA) triggering human sugar-sugar linkage (linkage 2-6) recognition? This will spell havoc among humanity as this new strain of avial flu will be able to invade the upper respiratory tract heavily populated with Neu5Ac-Galactose (linkage 2-6) and therefore, easily spread among humans. Extinction will be a an overstatement, but, about fifty million people died in 1918 due to influenza virus (H1N1), possibly an avian strain (or, swine). The bottom line is that we are just a mutation away from our sugar-sugar connection to be detected by a lethal virus. Can we save ourselves from this evolving devil?

(Reference. Science, 2006, 312, 404-410)

A Sonnet

I wrote it ten years ago when very young, wild and love-struck!

Ah! sleep is cure for the ache,

incoherent but joyous dreams of you.

Love me again with your smile,

love me again with your buoyant self.

We will talk with childlike freedom.

We will run in desperate affection.

Everyone will wonder about our charms.

We will murmur in each other’s ears.

I will kiss dove like bosoms and Caribbean eyes,

and, those cherry lips of divine amatory!

Hesitant and shy, forsake your gentle sobriety.

I will hold you with care and never let go,

and our breaths will be calm symphony. 

love changes a moment but not love!

Imagining Disenthralled Imagination

From antiquity, humans imagined to fly like birds, only a few believed that they can truly do it one day. Imagination thrusts upon us to innovate. Wright brothers made Ohio and North Carolina proud (just look at these states' license plates) by constructing the first flying machine. We take this discovery for granted like many other ones, for example, telephone, cars, electricity and so on. Imagine a world without modern technologies; eliminate just electricity from our lives, we will immediately be back to agrarian society with life expectancy less than forty. This will also bring about collateral repercussions on myriad aspects of human life such as socio-economics, politics, ethics etc. Our claim of being rational human will have to readjust.

It is still debatable if imagination can be installed through training. Every child's imagination is amazing because he/she is free from prejudices and inclinations. As he gets older, only a few of them are "crazy" enough to cultivate and reap rich dividends from it. Most parents, teachers and a large sections of society kill the imagination in children ruthlessly through rigid pedagogy. Most of us want others to image this world through our eyes, not through respective eyes of beholder. This is a cardinal sin and prime impediment to human progress. Structured course works of schools where we need to recite a few theories and believe them blindly are deserved to be hated. Arts (though I am convinced that science is a creative art) is more flexible in the sense that we can imagine whatever we want. Thinking out of the box in science is frowned upon in authoritarian cultures as if you are challenging the ten commandments of Bible. A large section of university professors design courses and research to create clones who will spread authoritarian imagination. Our scientific achievements in the last fifty years are less exemplary than first five decades of 20th century though we, now, have state of art laboratories. Have our imaginations become less fertile? Has grant writing crushed our creativity? It is important to nurture the students with diet of theories and evidences and then, encourage them to ask questions. Asking questions and challenging conformity should be rewarded, even better if students ask question and frame possible answers . In fact, asking questions and devising possible answers should be part of curriculum. Some of these questions can change the way we live: a) Can we build a machine which travels at almost speed of light? b) How will we detect earthquake before catastrophe arrives? c) Is there a mathematical equation which rules our life events? d) Can we attempt to build a live cell using cholesterol, fatty acids, only 20 amino acids and 16 pyranose sugars?

My personal experiences in research labs have shown that majority of us tend to be captivated by the lure of own creativity or theory. Wave of students nurture one dimensional hypotheses and hence, Professor's narcissism without questioning as if building a blind religion. This attachment gets stronger and stronger as we age since we spend most of our energy and time in developing a theory. At times, love affair gets so strong that some of us tend to disregard any contradictory evidences and prefer to put them under the rug. Just for the sack of beauty of individual creativity! Just for the glory of ephemeral fame! How hard it may be we must detach ourselves while working on an experiment passionately and innovation will follow the cautious skepticism. I am concluding this piece by quoting sixteenth American President, Abraham Lincoln, "The dogmas of the quiet past, are inadequate to the stormy present. The occasion is piled high with difficulty, and we must rise -- with the occasion. As our case is new, so we must think anew, and act anew. We must disentrall ourselves, and then we shall save our country." Let us disentrall ourselves from our one dimensional imagination and we will reconstruct a world of creative genius!

A Fool's Guide to Start a New Religion

Just follow the following steps

1. Find a solitary cave or mountain or jungle and the best if you can find a cave in a mountain jungle.
2. Claim that you have a divine vision/light/voice/scripture/whatever.
3. It is important to mention Moses, Jesus, Mohammed, Joseph Smith etc. so that you can attract the attention of people across religions.
4. Show some physical evidence like relics hidden in the cave, some symbol cut on stone, some scripture written in the oldest languages known to human such as Sanskrit, Hebrew, Egyptian (you can find a list of oldest languages in wikipedia). You will be smart to spend some time in learning that language so that you can translate for layman. If you are lazy, you can invent a completely new language and claim that those are God's words which only you can interpret
5. Write down a "Holy Book" and start to preach simultaneously. It will be smart to start small and simple in order to sell your asceticism and heavenly vision. Learning a few magic tricks is required.
6. If you want to attract modern technocrats, talk about facebook, google etc in the "Holy Book" and how God want you to guide them in finding spiritual purity.
7. Start propaganda that you are being persecuted by already existing religions. This will earn you sympathy and sympathy comes in US dollars.
8. Start the process of wider brain washing. You will find millions of them and some of them will be super rich, Harvard graduates, doctors, engineers and so on.
9. Build a temple or whatever you like, I mean whatever God has commanded you to build.
10. You will die billionaire among beautiful girls (Saint Hugh Hefner) and leave a millions of stupid, irrational, hypocrites who will build new nations and fight among themselves forever.

To A Kansas Girl

Radina’s Cafe, Aggieville
Today, you sit cross-legged on the front couch,
I just want to drink from your eyes.
Fifteen minutes pass by,
my imagination runs wild with every passing minute.
I wish I were a summer zephyr caressing 
through your light hair,
through your white mocha rubbed lips,
through your Sun kissed bosom…..

Hale Library, 24 hours study area
Your frequent trips to Facebook,
while working on calculus home-work.
Ah, those pictures of you and your friends!
weird faces and tongues and fingers,
as if carnival of your desire but seldom love.
You change your profile picture every second day.
You think I care?
I wonder if you ever read Frost
and his “Miles to go before I sleep.”
Or, Harper Lee’s “To Kill a Mockingbird”
Not even Mark Twain and his “Huckleberry Finn”?

Willard Hall, Gen. Chem. Class
I search for those eyes that consume me.
You are in a purple pride T-shirt in front row
and my heart rushes towards you.
I choose my place where I belong,
I hear your mellowed voice,
“I hate chemistry, it’s not fun.”
You asked for my calculator to figure 11 square
I wish the final result were 88, my face allover yours!

Recreation Center
As your ipod thunders on your ears,
my adrenaline and agility follow you;
your long legs and the “PINK” short,
I sweat at your fast suppleness.
Cycling beside your smell of pheromone,
I adore your image on the mirror.
I wish I were a momentary Kansas storm
embracing your every existence
under twinkling darkness of September sky.

Somewhere under Kansas cloud
I ride a bicycle everyday to school
and you drive a brand new Audi.
Though I cook my food in Indian spicy way;
You eat frozen food from Wal-Mart.
I am a rebel like the author of “Descent of Man”.
But, you want me to be saved by your God.
Your sunflower smile,
Your lovely beauty spot on dove like neck,
I sketch you with freedom of hues,
dazzling your lines with purple blood.
Will our everyday beliefs melt into sensible chaos?
Will our purple images be heard on the stone of eternity?

Monalisa! Do Not Smile Yet

A month ago, I went to a cafe for mocha and was surprised by Monalisa! Yes, she exactly looked like Monalisa of Leonardo. I was not prepared for this and I will never be. I never saw her again, it was a few frozen seconds. This poem is to express my utter surprise and desire to see her when it will still be drizzling, when it will still be fire on western horizon!

Those twinkling eyes infinite,
fertility of your lips and a few seconds’ quiet.
Ages ago, Da vinci painted you in moist desire
and now, there you are! a sudden joy entire.
O Monalisa, do not smile yet!

Let the sun go behind your rousing hair,
Let tenderness flood in, free from modern glare.
Look into my eyes Monalisa; and look deep,
You will see a poet lost in weep.
O Monalisa, do not smile yet!

Missing Nucleus in RBC

My latest love with evolution is an exciting and adrenaline-rich experience. We are trying to develop neutrophil based drug delivery at the inflammation sites. Neutrophils are white blood cells with dumbbell shaped nucleus and are the first ones to reach the site of inflammation to seek and destroy foreign bodies. It turns out that neutrophils are good at reaching for not only invading virus or bacteria but also cancer cells. The first striking property of neutrophils is their multi-lobled nucleus though continuous. What are the evolutionary benefits of such nucleus in constructing the first line of defense? Is it possible that chromosomes are separated from each other so that they can function independently without genetic interference? Can one set of genes switch on/off another set of genes? Or, are we evolving towards neutrophils without nucleus like red blood cells (RBCs) as both of them get differentiated from hematopoietic stem cells (HSCs)?

The missing nucleus of RBC has baffled the scientific community for ages. Several possible explanations are given, maximizing oxygen carrying capacity through disc shaped structure is the most notable explanation. We, now, know that HSC differentiates into two daughter RBCs, one with nucleus and the other without nucleus. The daughter cell with nucleus is phagocytized by macrophages leaving behind the RBC without nucleus. Mature RBCs cannot divide due to lack of nuclei and hence, no chance of cancer of RBCs. Hemoglobin is the oxygen carrying protein interacting with four porphyrin-Fe molecules present in the RBC membrane. If RBC doesn't have any genetic material, how does globin protein bind to the cell membrane of RBC? It is the HSC from which RBC differentiates, supplies the membrane bound protein. We have evolved with RBCs which circulate for about 120 days and then perish. HSCs generate RBCs continuously in the bone marrow. Removing nucleus from RBC kills the prospect of making mistake in genetic level and therefore, in the protein synthesis level extending mammalian life. You can counter-argue the survival of other vertebrates with nucleated RBCs! More questions need to be answered for complete understanding of this "weird" phenomenon.

References:

1. Ji, Peng; Jayapal, Senthil Raja; Lordish, Harvey, F. Enucleation of cultured mouse fetal erythroblasts requires Rac GTPases and mDia2. Nature Cell Biology, 2008, 10, 314-321

The Smart DNA

Ion channels are transmembrane proteins that play pivotal role in functioning of human biochemistry. From smell to touch, from stupidity to intelligence, from love to love making depend on firing of action potential in the neuron, the smallest unit of brain. It is very interesting to note that there is only a few ions responsible for initiation of action potential resulting myriad of biochemical functions. Only known ion channels are of Na+, Cl-, K+, Ca2+, Mg2+ ions. Most of these channels are ligand gated i.e. open or close only after binding of small organic molecules followed by transportation of these ions. For examples, we feel happy when serotonin ligand binds K+ ion channel and open it for K+ to rush out of the cell prompting depolarization of inner cell membrane (potential of the inner membrane changes from -60mV to +55mV). This process leads to cascade of protein synthesis switching on or off effector gene. The structural change of the neuron reflects in our everyday mood.

Dumb and Smart Gene

Repeated boost of serotonin is also responsible for converting short term memory into long term memory through extra axonal growth. The more we repeat, the more serotonin gets released to bind with ion channel, firing action potential frequently. A small molecule cAMP builds up inside the cell which in turn activates protein kinase A (PKA, all kinase enzymes phosphorylate another molecule). PKA phophorylates MAP kinase in order to act on a protein CREB-2 and deactivates it. CREB-2 is a regulatory protein which attaches on a gene to switch it off inhibiting protein synthesis for long term memory. On the contrary, PKA activates CREB-1, a regulatory protein binds with a gene to switch it on for protein production. This strengthens the neural connectivity consolidating memory. In a simplistic version, a dumb person is one who has high CREB-2/CREB-1 ratio.

The most interesting part is that one ligand is responsible for two completely different functions (mood change and memory formation) through two separate pathways. Is it possible that there is connection between these two pathways? I believe that we can learn better when we are in good mood (in both cases, serotonin is released). Evolution is minimalist! It uses one molecule available to optimize different functions.

Science Fiction 

The ions transport through protein channels on cell membrane are extremely abundant in nature. Na+ and Cl- are probably the most abundant ions found in ocean, evolutionary origin of us. Mg2+ and Ca2+ are also abundant in the rocks. Is there any ion channel for U238 in us? Probably not! U238 is a radioactive element which has disastrous health effect on human. I argue that a world full of U238 would have an evolutionary route to species with U238 channels and radioactive humans! Imagine a world of radioactive isotopic humans. Anything is possible in the universe of infinite worlds.

References:

1. Kandel, Eric. In Search of Memory, W. W, Norton & Company Inc, 2006
2. Jacob, Francois. Evolution and Tinkering, Science, 1977, 196 (4295), 1161-1166

Hyderabadi Chicken Biriyani

Okay! this might not be poetry, cooking interests me a lot and probably, this explains my passion for organic synthesis. I have cooked Hyderabadi chicken biriyani for last one year and the recipe was given to me by my good friend Lateef. Here it is:

1. 1 Kg Chicken cut in cubes (if you use drumstick, make small cuts on the muscle and add meat tenderizer)
2. Cut onion straight and long and fry it in oil until color becomes golden. Add the fried onion on top of cut chicken
3. Add Banne nawab hyderabadi biriyani masala to (2)
4. Add 4 table spoon yogurt just enough to make layer on chicken to (2)
5. Add one lemon juice to (2)
6. Add 2 green chili cut long, add cilantro leaves (2)
7. Add oil (6-10 table spoon, more oil tastes better and chicken will not stick to the utensil) to (2)
8. Mix everything thoroughly with chicken and marinade for one hour in refridgerator (4 degree C) in a 5 L pressure cooker
9. Soak basmati rice (6cups) soak in water for 1.5 to 2 hours
10. Take a container and boil water with 1.5 table spoon salt when boiled, add soaked rice into boiled water for half to 70% cooked, (important: must be less than 8 min or ~70% done)
11. Filter the rice immediately making sure that there is no water at all
12. Take chicken out of refridgerator and add ~20 mint leaves (pudina leaves) on top of mirinaded chicken
12. Add rice on top of marinaded chicken and level it off
13. Mix color with milk on top of rice
14. Cap the top of pressure cooker with aluminum foil followed by a heavy tray on top of foil making sure that no vapor escapes from pressure cooker
15. heat the pressure cooker 15-20 min medium, 30 min slow heat
16. Check if chicken is done by using a long fork
17. Mix everything together making sure that rice don’t get broken

Forever and a day

Our promises are still louder than anger!
when we sat side by side and looked into the eyes.
My sweet lass grew up on my laps,
Laps of imagination…………
We said ‘ye, we are man and wife.’
Luscious passion ran through us
for forever and a day!

A heart-filled pendant and its rosy shine
caressed till the brim of tenderness,
was safe in my stealthy love.
I would stand behind that snowy neck
and surprises followed……her pink blushes!
Hugged with pristine amusement,
for forever and a day!

She sang for me on a happy note,
exclaiming a delighted cry; such is my sweetheart!
Tears followed several times.
Standing bright by "those" moments;
we came back again and again
Ah! wonderfully blessed embraces!
She insists again…..but, cant stop loving
for forever and a day!

Faded love and weary energy
knocked on our vitality………we faded…..and
natural it was, still she is conquering
and will always…….nothing has lost
as started to dream again those golden locks
kissing over my face
for forever and a day!

Pain is eloquent and elegant.
I love, now each and every moment
as she starts to dictate my vintage heart.
I do see her surprise beauties everywhere!
What a moment when she will be
overwhelmed and run to where she belonged
for forever and a day!

To Oblivion

If this pain were a dream
and you would be a surprise of dawn!
Momentary lapse of memory that I urge thee
wish you brought some lethe.
A curse of half a year and fragility
we depart though my soul is in blissful array.
Sweet memories are woeful dreams
you seem to forget, choose harsh means.
Lingering pictures on sad eyes
and you are part of each canvas, what a malevolence!
My heart shrinks to the lips of melancholy
famine and gloom befall on an almost corpse.
I wish screams were just dream-ache
and you would be a morning kiss!

One Last Wish

If death prevails,
Who bewails?
You neither hear nor feel.
What a woe to appeal!
Nothingness, life continues
and despair remains.
Will this the end of you and me,
in a tranquilled and resolved folly?
Hardly you would ever get over
my care and tenderness.

Drop, drop; nectar of present and past
you brought both, malady and paradise, vast!
Ever willed zealous, now and after-life,
a solitary rose, love in rife.
Shower, shower; flower and good smell.
Coffin of expectations, there I dwell.
You will never know, never will you sorrow,
but, I have one last wish that you owe.
An adieu and a last flower,
promise, a yellow rose laughter!

Through Prism

Wonderful agility of a foreign bird brings back nostalgia of romances.
She is hopping like a sparrow when it is drizzling outside.
Violet, indigo, blue, green, yellow, orange and red
invite me to the fast fading sky.

Pitter-Patter on slanting roofs makes a tide; there heart blossoms;
I make some paper boats and see them drift away!
A moment buzzing with her lithe innocence.
Warmth of her presence and joy
makes me wonder if it is too fragile!

You Are

You have round lips of either Heather or Emily;
And deep eyes of either Liz or Jenny,
Maybe you have a foreign name;
Lolita, Chen Li, Shabnam, Iwona?
I see you everywhere;
In the food court, in Hale library,
In the football stadium, in exam halls.
You come in colors multitude, but purple rules.

Those sounds you make round and round;
“I know,” "whatever,” “I was like….,”
As if you are an actress, is it just me?
You work hard every day
and wait for weekend crimson.

I see you again on Saturday night,
In Aggieville or in a house party;
among boisterous youth and agility
when your virginity cries aloud for liberty
behind the veil of alcohol.
Did you see the ad on every Collegian stand?
It’s about HPV, remember?
You wake up late on Sunday
and dash to Chipotle for brunch.
Or you dress up for the church
Or for a trip to the lake.
No? Unrestrained lust of yours, but less love!
I wish you had wings to drive your vitality.
I wish you were real without that make-up.

The other day at Radina’s,
You looked into my eyes
And I dived in its enamored depth.
I overheard your murmur,
“That romantic stupid,”
Yeah, that’s me!

A Lucid Dream

I watched us through an ancient window.
It was a half-moon.
Two years ago and now;
still vivid, still potent!
Fragments of figments
reignited your fire in me,
scripted in subconscious,
albeit, made sense.
I was bewitched by your delicate length.
There was some guilt in both.
You thought we moved on, did we?
Under a shower of shine,
your sound and smell melted in me.
Our lips unrevealed and
warmth of your bosoms permeated through.
You elaborated your every detail on me
at the rim of Baltic sea.
There were layers of lovely mist at start,
then, started to disappear.

Morning sun brings the glorious dopa-shower to a halt.
While still dripping through, I miss your every element.
While morning steroid surges, I love you more than ever.
I will chase every fossil of our love rest of the day,
in fleeting thoughts, in frozen images.
O memory, what a conspiracy you planned to inflict a dream!
You excavated fossils of lost love in a vain canyon.
I wish I died while dreaming and woke up by the thirst of Baltic sea.